Role-Playing Games in Bed: How to Avoid the Fatal Mistake and Enjoy.

According to The Sun: Role-playing games can be a great way to spice up intimate life. But when something goes wrong, the consequences can be unpredictable. I learned this from my own experience.

I started experimenting with my ex, and he decided to tie me up with his belt. Sounds tempting, right?

But when he decided to take it off, he accidentally hit me in the face. That's definitely not what I imagined in my fantasy!

This became a brush for thoughts when a reader shared a story about role-playing with his girlfriend that went wrong when she did something that shocked him.

I am a sex expert at The Sun, and in my new series of articles about sex, I will explain how to enjoy role-playing games with your partner.

Starting with Certain Themes

Q. I have been dating a girl for five years, and recently we decided to add some excitement to our life.

We fell into a certain sexual routine – our usual missionary once a month, and we were slowly losing our spark, both in and out of bed.

She suggested role-playing, and I thought: why not? We chose bondage costumes, and she asked me to play the 'submissive' role.

Everything was going well... until she started saying dirty things.

Suddenly, she began humiliating me about the size of my penis, calling it 'Mr. Microscopic'.

At that point, I didn't even suspect that I was lacking anything – and now I am completely astonished.

I had never seen this side of her before, and I am in shock. She keeps asking what's wrong, but I’m afraid it could not only ruin our sex life, but also affect our entire relationship.

Georgie says: There is nothing wrong with your reaction. Most men will be in shock and quite rightly disappointed at such a moment.

There is even a term for this scenario – humiliation for having a small penis (SPH) – when the dominant partner teases or humiliates the submissive.

But a partner should never suddenly bring this up during play. This type of game should always be discussed beforehand, and many men with small members actually promote this.

However, that doesn't mean the relationship is doomed.

I understand how it can upset you, overwhelm you with emotions and worries.

It's best to choose a calm moment outside of the bedroom to talk about it. Avoid words that could offend or feel threatening.

Focus on your feelings: 'I was in shock when you said that, and it really threw me out of the moment. I want to be honest with you.'

Then ask yourself: do you still love your girlfriend? Did you enjoy playing up to that moment?

If so, there’s no reason not to try again – just set clear boundaries.

Agreement on what's off-limits and choosing a safe word or signal before play

Georgie Kelly, sex expert Sun

Define what is not allowed, choose a safe word, and make a plan for what you are both willing to do before diving back into play.

In this article, I will show you how to explore fantasies and dive into role-playing with your partner in a fun, healthy way...

Start with What Turns You On

Before telling your partner about your desires, take time to explore your fantasies. Some people know them right away, others may need a little time.

Watch steamy shows on Netflix or read erotica. Solo sessions are a great way to safely explore your own desires, without pressure or judgment.

You might even draw inspiration (and ideas for costumes!) from a little honest exploration.

When you know what turns you on, you'll be in a better position to confidently share it with your partner.

Communication

When you’re trying to try something new in bed, communication is key – it means setting clear boundaries from the very start.

Be honest with your partner. They can't read minds, so openness is the best way to avoid problems right off the bat.

If you agree on what you’re comfortable with, establish a safe word or action.

A safe word is a pre-discussed signal that means 'stop'. It’s better to choose something unusual – something you wouldn’t say in the heat of the moment.

If you’re using a gag or can’t speak, choose an action for safety.

Define this clearly – for example, a finger snap or a ‘stop’ gesture, like a professional wrestler.

Get into Character

Role-playing games are a great way to spice up intimate life and carefully immerse yourself in BDSM.

You can make it colorful or, conversely, adopting another persona can help you step outside yourself and realize your desires.

Transforming into another persona can help you step outside yourself and realize your desires

Georgie Kelly, sex expert

Stores like LoveHoney and Ann Summers offer a wide variety of role-play outfits perfect for beginners – think sexy police officer for the classic 'cops and robbers' scenario.

Or, if you want elegance, draw inspiration from 'Bridgerton' – a fitted corset for her and a stylish suit for you.

Shopping Together

Who said that role-playing games should only start when you are both dressed up?

The preamble can start long before you even get to the bedroom. Even shopping together can be a very erotic and fun alternative to ordinary shopping.

Pick out costumes for each other and start thinking about the roles you will play.

Don't forget about props: handcuffs, rope, whips, chains – anything that will help you fully embody your character.

Create an Atmosphere

Another way to enhance role-playing is to take sex out of the bed.

Choose a new location – like a hotel room – to embody your fantasy.

If you choose the 'cops and robbers' theme, something more budget-friendly will be needed, while a scenario in the style of 'Bridgerton' would suit a luxury room in an antique hotel to fully immerse in the character.

Let Your Imagination Run Wild

Role-playing games don’t always require traditional costumes – you can create your own theme.

One of my favorite options is to recreate a dirty one-night stand.

Dress up and leave separately to a bar, exchanging glances across the room and ‘picking’ each other up as if you just met.

Then book a night at a cheap hotel to live out the one-night experience.

It’s shameless, fun, and you’ll both go through the 'walk of shame' together in the morning.

So, role-playing games can be a fun and exciting way to spice up intimate life. It's important to set clear boundaries and discuss everything in advance to avoid surprises. Active communication and trust between partners are key components of a successful experience in the world of role-playing games.