Sex Expert Accidentally Sent an Explicit Photo to Her Dad: How to Avoid Embarrassment.

When sexual texts go awry

According to The Sun: When sexual messages work, it’s truly wonderful. But if something goes wrong, it can become a real catastrophe.

I personally have encountered something similar, and I still remember one horrible incident.

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I was in the process of sending a sexual message to my ex, but accidentally sent a photo of a centipede with eggplants and Splash signs to my dad. The embarrassment was off the charts.

In a panic, I tried to convince him that this message was about making spicy curry, but let’s just say he didn’t believe it.

This awkward memory came back to me this week when I read a letter from a reader. And believe me, I feel full sympathy for her.

Like me, she was texting friends, and one unfortunate flick of the finger triggered a true catastrophe.

The problem with sexual messaging

Q. I wanted to spice up my relationship with my partner, so I decided to surprise him with a sexual photo.

We have been together for five years, initially having sex regularly, but lately the passion has fizzled out.

So I got naked and sent an explicit photo – but suddenly realized that I had sent it to a friend I was chatting with (and it was completely innocent!).

Now my boyfriend is absolutely furious. He thinks I did it on purpose, as he has always suspected I have a crush on his friend. I swear it was just a simple mistake.

What can I do to prove that it was an accident? How can I restore our relationship?

I would like to return to sending explicit messages, but, obviously, I’m not very skilled at it. Any advice?

Georgie says: Rest assured, mistakes happen – especially with sexual messages. Trust me, I’ve been there (my poor dad still hasn’t forgiven me for the 'eggplant incident').

Give your boyfriend some space to calm down. Deep down, he probably knows it was an innocent misunderstanding, but it seems like he has some doubts about you and his friend.

Choose the right moment (and not in the bedroom) to discuss these concerns before sending any more explicit photos.

You need to give him plenty of reassurance and try to see the situation from his perspective.

Don’t get upset with him for feeling hurt – instead, calmly remind him that it was an honest mistake, nothing more. Point out the things you like about him.

Tips for successful sexual communication

Don’t get discouraged. You made a human mistake, but that doesn’t mean you represent yourself poorly in this matter. They say there’s no such thing as a 'bad' sexual message – the key is to be cautious.

When done correctly, sexual messages can be a true breakthrough. Your brain is the organ that ignites passion, and a few provocative texts can be the perfect warm-up before the 'real deal.'

One mistake doesn’t mean you have to say goodbye to this form of communication.

However, remember that in today’s fast-paced world, sexual messages require your full attention – otherwise, you risk turning your passion into an awkward group chat.

Secrets of successful sex communication

Start slowly

Don't jump in with explicit images right away. In the case of sexual messaging, less is more… at least at first. The secret lies in building tension, raising the temperature, and igniting desire in your partner.

Start with hints, flirty questions, and a generous dose of encouragement, rather than explicit content.

Think of it as a digital strip tease: you reveal just a little bit at a time, keeping them in suspense.

Olivia West

Protect yourself

Many of us have a password to log into our phone, but if your WhatsApp is filled with provocative messages, that’s not enough.

You need to take extra precautions so that no one can breach your conversations.

Move your explicit chats to a 'secured' folder on WhatsApp for added security. Make sure explicit photos are not automatically uploaded to your phone.

Don’t leave them guessing

If someone has exposed themselves to you (literally), this isn’t the best time to stay indifferent. They will start to overthink what they sent, which can diminish their confidence and kill the mood.

If you’re planning to engage in a session of sexual messaging, ensure your phone is fully charged and that you have no other distractions. Your partner deserves your full attention.

Check your background

There’s nothing worse than having a toilet or messy room show up in the frame. Sure, your partner is focused on you, but your surroundings matter too.

Once, I sent a sexual photo to a guy whose room looked like it had exploded – crumpled sheets, clutter everywhere. I’m not a messy person, but it was very off-putting.

Never show your face

This is a rule that cannot be underestimated: never and under no circumstances should you show your face. I’m not talking about how long you’ve been together or how much you trust them.

People and relationships change, and in today’s age of revenge porn, you don’t want to put yourself at risk.

When done correctly, sexual messages can be a true breakthrough – the brain is the sexiest organ.

Carefully store contacts

If your partner has the same name as a family member, friend, or God forbid, your boss, you need to be very careful to avoid awkward situations.

Give your partner an entirely random name for the contact – ideally starting with a Z or X, so you can be sure that no one else in your life has that name.

If you’re not texting Zendaya, we’re with you, and let’s be honest, no mortal soul is that happy...

Beware of autocorrect

If you’re a bad typist, autocorrect can be a lifesaver – but it’s pretty dangerous. Imagine sending 'show me your butt' and it turns into 'show me your mom'... that would be super awkward!

Turn off autocorrect when you’re engaging in sexual chats, or carefully review every message before sending.

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Use good lighting

You want to look your best in photos, so pay attention to nice lighting. A soft, warm lamp or natural light from a window is ideal.

Just make sure the neighbor isn’t getting a free show while you’re doing this!

Avoid using social media for taking nudes. Filters may look fun on Instagram or Snapchat, but one wrong click, and your explicit photo could end up in front of all your followers – and that’s definitely not what you’re hoping for!

I accidentally sent a sexual message to my dad, that’s hard to top.

Don’t juggle multiple chats

Don’t have multiple conversations going at once during sexual messaging. If you respond to more than one person, there’s a high chance you’ll send an explicit message to the wrong person.

Focus your attention on the person you’re talking to – that way you can avoid awkward situations and mistakes.

Be honest with yourself

Don’t let yourself get so caught up that you start sending inappropriate messages that you don’t intend to act on in real life.

This can lead to awkward or even humiliating situations if you promise something or claim to like something that’s really not true.

It’s perfectly fine to dream about fantasies, but if there’s a chance your sexual messages could become reality, be sincere. This will help avoid pitfalls and keep communication hot and charged.

Getty The importance of skilful communication through sexual messages is very complex but incredibly vital, especially in relationships. Crossing boundaries and choosing reminders of failed situations can not only create negative experiences but can also significantly enhance your relationship if understanding and trust are present. Be cautious, thoughtful, and most importantly, don’t be afraid to share your thoughts and feelings.