23 Years Together, Living Apart: Why Separate Residences Are Becoming a Relationship Trend.

Couple apart for 23 years
Couple apart for 23 years

The 'Living Apart Together' Concept

According to Vox - Загальний: More couples, especially those aged 50 to 60, are embracing the 'Living Apart Together' (LAT) model. Take Mike and Susan, who have been in a committed relationship for 23 years yet have never shared a home—and have no plans to do so. Their arrangement highlights a growing shift among older adults.

Between 2000 and 2019, the number of married couples living separately rose by over 25%. This surge reflects changing social norms and evolving ideas about traditional partnerships. For many in their 50s and 60s, retirement becomes a period of rethinking how they want to live. A growing number of couples are choosing to maintain emotional closeness and mutual support while residing in different homes.

Research and Communities

This phenomenon is backed by studies and publications analyzing modern relationships. For instance, Vicki Larson's book 'LATitude: How You Can Make a Live Apart Together Relationship Work' delves into her personal experience and broader trends. Similar topics are explored in the 'Learn to Love' podcast, which debunks myths about living separately. A New York Times article also highlights why this trend is especially appealing to older individuals.

  • The 'Apartners' Facebook community, where couples living apart can share their experiences.
  • Articles from AARP and Time that examine how marriage evolves in midlife.

The rising popularity of the 'living apart together' concept signals a shift in societal views on relationships, particularly in later life. This may stem from a desire to preserve independence and personal space even within long-term partnerships. As social norms change, traditional relationship models no longer fit everyone's needs, prompting many to seek formats that better align with their lifestyles and values.


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