Tradhusbending: Why Men Are Running Away From Traditional Roles.

According to Vox: Daniel and Brianna Bell first met while studying at a college near Toronto. Brianna actively adhered to the traditional values promoted by her conservative Christian church. After their wedding, Daniel became a pastor, and Brianna became a homemaker.

Brianna lived the life of a 'traditional wife' - a trend popularized by online influencers that entails women adopting conservative gender roles in their families. For her, this meant making homemade laundry detergent, being gentle and modest, and prioritizing her husband, children, and God in her life. Meanwhile, for Daniel, this traditional model proved to be somewhat more complicated.

The Challenges of the Traditional Man

On the one hand, 'I felt like he didn't need to cook,' he said. 'I barely clean.' On the other hand, he had to provide for the whole family on a pastor's salary, sometimes only $9,000 a year. He described immense pressure: 'I want to give my family the life they want,' but that is 'impossible on one income in our world.'

Financial difficulties were just one aspect of the traditional life the Bells faced over time. 'A huge part of this subculture is that men have the final say and authority,' Bell said. 'I never felt that this was practical.'

The Bells' experience reflects some of the contradictions associated with the role of the 'traditional man,' which is rarely talked about, despite the popularity of female influencers representing 'traditional wives.' The idea of the 'traditional wife' cannot exist without a husband; he is the head of the family to whom others must submit. However, men who uphold traditional values often remain in the shadows, and discussions about 'traditional' gender roles often center on women. 'Traditional men' are so invisible that the term itself requires quotation marks. During interviews for this article, I frequently had to explain what I meant.

The Lack of Discussion on Men’s Roles

The invisibility of traditional men reflects a broader vacuum in discussions about their role in debates over family policy and culture. Amid declining birth rates, conservative politicians and activists (mostly men) are making significant efforts to influence women's behavior. However, it is not clearly defined what the new traditionalists believe men should do—especially at a time when being the sole breadwinner is becoming increasingly challenging. In 2025, do young men want to be traditional men? And if not, what do they want to do instead?

Where Are the Traditional Men?

Content about 'traditional wives' is usually targeted at women; some influencers provide explicit advice for homemakers. Indeed, it is hard to be a woman online without running into videos about 'traditional wives,' and visuals of calm mothers with cute children engaged in domestic tasks can captivate even those who do not adhere to traditional values.

These videos carry a subtle promise to women watching them— a promise that a life of peace and beauty is available if only the right choices are made. One of the main messages of traditional wives' content is that 'if you look a certain way, if you prioritize home life, children, and traditional female activities, you will have a supportive husband who provides for you and values you,' said Sara Petersen, author of Momfluenced: Inside the Maddening, Picture-Perfect World of Mommy Influencer Culture.

'The traditional wife is such a visual artifact. She exists to be seen and received.'

Sara Petersen, author Momfluenced

The labors of these influencers are also deeply visual: from gathering flowers to creating DIY versions of popular processed snacks. Like home canning influencers, their activities are practical and analog, drawing many viewers in an era when more time is spent behind screens.

What Does a Traditional Man Do?

'The model of the male breadwinner has long been diminishing,' said Pamela Aronson, a sociology professor at the University of Michigan-Dearborn and author of Gender Revolution: How Electoral Politics and #MeToo Are Reshaping Everyday Life. Unlike in the 1960s, when many men could support a family with a job in the industry, today 'that has completely disappeared.'

Traditional men who run their Instagram accounts often share the experiences of farmers or self-employed professionals.

So, in the modern world, where traditional 'male' professions are disappearing, and men seek to become fathers, the concept of the stay-at-home dad may become an archetype gaining popularity.

Brianna and Daniel have changed their roles in recent years. Brianna began to distance herself from traditional Christian values and gained greater financial independence. 'We have gained much more freedom because of this,' Daniel noted.

For the Bells, the desire to be a good example to their three daughters has also been an important factor in changing their lifestyle. 'What example do I want to show to the person I would like to love one day?' Daniel asked.

'I think if you love someone, you live in equality; you value what they have to say,' Bell said. 'This is a vision of humanity and love in your partner, instead of perceiving them as a certain role.'